back to the bardo

Mom: I haven’t heard from you in over a week.

Me: I’m recovering from having my neck zapped, remember?

Mom: Well, you could still call your mother.

Me: Well, you’re a nurse, you should know better.

Mom: Not about that.

Me: You knew I had a painful surgical procedure that leaves me screwed up for a few weeks afterward. That calls for a pretty generic response in the “How To Be A Mom Who Is Also A Nurse” handbook, and your phone works fine, so there’s no reason you couldn’t have called me in the last TEN days to see how I’m doing.

Mom: … (starts yelling at my stepdad to put the dog down)

Al-Qaeda is claiming responsibility for an attack on a Saudi oil refinery. Let the jackals feast on the entrails of their own young for a change, to put it in the vernacular.

Or just future winners of the Darwin Awards?

Either way, they can’t go fast damned enough. If only they’d stick to the big ‘splodey test ranges or the cemetaries they like to party in, instead of spreading their disgusting philosophies in action.