Jan 27 2010

Of This And That And Ravens

I spoke with a girlfriend this morning who I haven’t talked to in over a year, and had a good time catching up on the past year, unfun as it’s been for both of us. We used to work together at Pfizer and she has a medical background, so understood what I was telling her in my short blorp summary of 2009: “this and this and this, so then that and that in order to prevent THAT and now this and these are some of the consequences and other things that are going on out of all of this and that.”  I found myself unable to articulate my primary condition and issues using the proper medical terms – situational or stress-induced aphasia I can remember and label and say – but the other things, bulging and herniated discs and osteophytes and such words as would accurately explain what I have been dealing with, simply stayed in the dark closet at the back of my brain, unwilling to come forward into the light of day.
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Nov 4 2009

Learning Patience

I wish I had hungered for patience as a child, but I’ll do my best to remember mellow light like honey in a jar, and to feel that warmth granting my bones graceful lassitude when I want to power forward in a panic-fueled rage against time and pain and money and all the things I haven’t done yet that pick at my flesh like crows come to feast on my inadequacies.

My GIST list is behind in posting, but not behind in my head. I have many days of grace to blog about, to account for, to be accountable for documenting here as a reminder to myself when I’ve forgotten the honeyed glow that lights my progress over the last eight months:

March – the MRI
April – the last day in a cubicle
May – the physical therapist
June – the first epidural
July – the second epidural
August – the 16th c. map of Asia writ large in hives all over my arms and legs
September – the third epidural, finally
October – the first lesson in routine pain management, reinforced by the physical therapist
November – the diagnostic nerve block followed by RF ablation of the offending nerves
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Oct 7 2009

GIST ~29/365~

~ thwarting Angus’ attempt to lick my eyeball
~ got some fish oil into Emma’s stomach and not just on her nose
~ bananas begging to be banana bread
~ my funky mermaid wall clock
~ the earthen loam scent of tea tree oil hand soap