Yay Meaningless Blather
Blather blather blather… wait, I found something under this webpage…
According to Spacefem, I am Happily Evil. This is not an earth-shattering revelation - I’m quite comfortable with gleefully induced carnage, seek it out, actually. Ah well, cute graphic.
- Old Navy:: Fleece
- Out:: Of the closet
- Indecent:: Exposure
- UPN:: Star Trek
- Pupil:: Dilated
- Toothpaste:: Dried
- 1999:: Prince
- Passion:: Christ
- Social security:: Name change
- Cliff:: Claven
My subconscious is such the product of media advertising. Oh look, there’s Lassie!
Last but not least, here’s my well-rounded workout plan for St. Patty’s Day:
Cardio: walking from one bar to another - at least 50 minutes figuring 10 minutes travel time between bars, so just aim to hit at least 6 bars over the course of the evening
Weight Training: pints are heavy so drink lots - at least 2 pints per bar, figure about 10 swallows per pint, alternate hands
Isometrics: push yourself away from the bar to move onto the next bar - this is the toughest one, but works core back and stomach muscles, kinda like Pilates but with better hydration. Note: give yourself plenty of time to complete this one at each bar - you may have to do a few practice reps before actually walking away from that cute bartender.
Personal trainers, take note. You may use my workout plan for your clients, but know that I expect a kickback or gratuity of some sort whenever a client gets snockered (the full licensing fee is due and payable immediately upon any client becoming falling-down drunk, because then they’ll need your services even more in conjunction with their physical therapist to heal whatever they hurt when they fell down, so you’ll be making more money and so should I so there).
You may now return to your regularly scheduled programming. Carry on.